Hello beautiful ones of the Most High! Oh boy, I have really missed saying that! It’s so good to be back. So many things have happened since I last blogged and a couple of days ago I realized that I hadn’t blogged in a year…a whole year, WOW! I am hoping I do not go through this phase again but well, life happened and I had to take care of other areas of my life; as a result I was lacking inspiration. I thought about the days blogging would make me happy and decided it was time to give it another go.
This post is dedicated to sharing a couple of things I have learnt through my 32 years being alive on God’s green earth. Of course, there are several lessons and experiences I have had so it would be impossible to document everything in one blog post. I will, however, pick out some of the things I’ve learnt and share with you. I hope you enjoy this one.
One of the most important lessons for me has got to be learning to love myself. Growing up I didn’t do too much of that if any at all. It really has been a journey and I can confidently say that this is the only time that I truly love and appreciate myself. Getting to this stage was not easy and it took many baby steps but I am here now. It took a lot of stepping back and putting myself ahead of others to realize that I am important and deserve love from myself first. Some of the things I did to get to this stage were to look at myself in the mirror and speak positive, uplifting words to myself as well as ALOT of praying. Many times I have been told I care too much about others and tend to put them and their needs ahead of mine which has caused many disappointments in the past but I learnt from them nonetheless.
“Grace you are too emotional, you need to relax” – this is one of the things I have heard said to me way too many times in my life lol. For those who know me, you will know I am quite the emotional being and I do try to “manage” my emotions; sometimes it works out well and sometimes, well, I end up in tears or raising my voice at someone lol. When Grace is upset she cries, when Grace gets angry she cries, when Grace is moved she cries and when Grace is happy she cries – that is a lot of crying right? LOL! That’s me. I’ve had a lot of nonsense spewed out about this part of me and I did get upset about it for a while but you know what? Life goes on and I had to snap out of it and keep it moving. At one point I thought there really was something wrong with me because of some of the things that got to me. I had to accept this is who I am and this is how I am. All I can do is work on “managing” these emotions of which I can say I have made some progress.
There is no one better in the world you can be but be yourself. In high school, throughout university and even after school I sometimes found myself in situations where I had to act a certain way or do or say certain things in order to fit in or be accepted. It was fun while it lasted and seemed ok at the time but then I started to lose myself and freaked out a little. God created me a certain way, why was I trying to change that? I am fearfully and wonderfully made and I found that the more I am myself completely the more at peace and happy I am. Being a people pleaser can be so draining. I choose to be unapologetically Grace and I have no regrets whatsoever.
The older I get the more confident I feel and I absolutely love it! Something happened to me when I turned 30 and I never want to look back. In the past, I struggled to speak up and express my feelings about different situations but now, oh boy! Lol! If I am unhappy about something best believe I speak up and say so. A couple of years ago I would have kept it to myself and cried all alone. Now I don’t cry about it, I will find you and tell you exactly how I am feeling. There are some really uncomfortable situations like a man being all weird, making all sorts of sexual advances and comments. I do not even hesitate, I speak up and say “you are making me really uncomfortable. I would appreciate it if you didn’t speak to me that way”.
Can we talk about love? Lol, let’s! I have loved a couple of times in this life and also learnt several lessons from this one. I’ve been through some pretty hectic breakups and separation, being ghosted, lol, also done some ghosting, lol, but I told myself I would never let those experiences stop me from loving again. I will keep this one very short because some of you are extremely nosy lol. I will, however, end off with this, I am currently experiencing love I have never experienced before – it is genuine, intentional and pure, and I am grateful.
Stepping out of my comfort zone and challenging myself is something else I started exploring in my 30s. Last year February I joined a dance school, Baila Afrika, to learn how to dance Kizomba and it is one of the best decisions I ever made. I love the music, I love the people, I love the vibe. It is here that I learnt that if you want something you’ve got to get up and go get it because no one will bring it to you. Let me explain this last point lol- there are usually more women than gentlemen at the dance parties so if you want to dance you have to get up and ask a gentleman for a dance. Heeeey! In the beginning, it was weird for me but you kinda get used to it lol. In addition to asking gents I know to dance, I also try to dance with someone I have never danced with before and the leaders (sometimes female) all have different styles. It’s really interesting to get a feel of the different styles. I love Kizomba!
Lastly, for this post, I would like to talk about my style and how it has evolved over the years. I have not always considered myself stylish and only started feeling stylish after I left university. I have gone through several phases busy as the tomboy, for example, when I dreaded wearing a dress or skirt, even at school. My favourite uniform involved trousers lol, the most comfortable thing ever. A couple of years down the line and I am here, loving my style. I love dressing up and looking good and my outfits make me feel confident, sexy, classy and always adding some Grace.
Outfit 1:Dress – Zara|| Shoe- Mr Price|| Bag- Gift|| Earrings- Mr Price||
Outfit 2 : Trench – ReRockedCollections || Tights- Forever21|| Shoes- Jet|| Hat- Mr Price||Belt-More Graca Finds||
Outfit 3: Trench – More Graca Finds|| Polo Neck – Mr Price|| Skirt- More Graca Finds|| Shoes- Zara||